headstone

my body
is a graveyard.

the bruises are fading
the nail marks have healed
but they were only gravestones anyway,

marking the places
you had whispered into my skin.

a lot of words
floating like smoke
from the coke can you passed me.

fogging up my head
like the words
that crawled beneath
the gravestones
you placed

beside my hips
beneath my collarbone
between my thighs.

the markers have faded
but the words are still there

light as smoke
from a coke can:

youre so beautiful.
rest in peace.

--erin

the stars are dead

someone told me
that the stars im watching
are already dead.

someone told me
that theyre far enough away
that the light is already dead.

there are stars in your eyes and

someone told me
that theyre far enough away
that the light is already dead.

someone told me
that the stars im watching
are already dead.


--erin

remember that time we all watched a guy walk a tightrope over the grand canyon on live tv

my tears and

her tears and

his tears and

their tears

cut their way through my heart

and now there's a groove deep enough

to call the grand canyon

and god cried so much for years

about my tears and

her tears and

his tears and 

their tears

that he created a groove deep enough

to call the grand canyon

and it's grand.

oh, it's grand.

grand enough that people walk tightropes over it

and a "grand" nation

glues its eyes to a screen

hoping those people don't fall and 

hoping those people fall

and god cries some more

because he didn't want anyone to hope that they fall

and those people will make it across in one piece

and a "grand" nation 

will sigh

in relief

in disappointment

and god 

will sigh

in relief

in disappointment

and i will walk across the grand canyon

cut into my heart

and no one

in this "grand" nation

will be glued to a screen

because they'll be busy walking across a tightrope

over their own grand canyon

cut into them by a "grand" nation

and every time they make it across

they'll sigh

in relief

in disappointment

and god's tears will cut deeper into the grand canyon

because he was the one that created this "grand" nation

that half hopes it falls into its own grand canyon

because he was the one that created this "grand" nation

glued to a screen

half hoping that people will fall into god's grand canyon

and it's "grand".

oh, it's "grand".

--erin

astral projections

i can almost feel your hand over mine

and i don't mind

i can almost feel your breath on my neck
and i don't mind

i can almost feel my feet pressing into your sheets
and i don't mind

i can almost feel your teeth pulling at my lips
and i don't mind

i can almost feel my heart beating into your skin
and i don't mind

i can almost feel your empty words tangling in my hair
and i don't mind

i can almost feel the bruises on my hips
and i don't mind

i can almost feel your fingers on my throat
and i don't mind

i can almost feel you killing me
and i don't mind

and i should mind

and i don't mind


--erin

cyclical

my bones felt like glass,
but they haven't broken yet,

and
her eyes are growing
and shrinking
along with the moon

and
her lungs are growing
and shrinking
along with the moon

and
her faith is growing
and shrinking
along with the moon

and
my bones are made of plastic.

i can beat
and
i can breathe

while she grows
and shrinks
along with the moon.

she thinks her bones are made of glass
and she thinks she is the moon,
but she hasn't broken yet.

i haven't broken yet.


--erin

sometimes, when you are a man

i'm forgetting my soul at the bottom of a purse
with red lipstick and a grey notebook
that's quiet enough to make me wonder
what it would say if i got around
to opening it.

my thoughts slide back down into a pile of
"gothic cathedrals tend to have rib vaults
and pointed arches.
romanesque cathedrals usually have groin vaults
and rounded arches."
"lady macbeth goes crazy because she focuses so hard
on distinguishing imagination from reality
that when her imagination becomes her reality
she doesn't realize it."
"i hate myself for loving you.
and by you i mean 5 seconds of summer.
i swear.
all my indie street cred is out the window."
"hitchcock usually gets credit for creating the accordian zoom
because of his application of it in vertigo.
this is significant because it is used a means
of character development and revelation."
and it all gets lost.

i'm drawing in the chipped parts of my
black fingernails like they'll redeem me.
it doesn't mean anything.
it doesn't mean anything.

i'm used to holding myself together like the arms
around my torso can keep the world
from falling.
my arms are around my torso but the world
is falling.


--erin



you wear stretchy pants in your room.
it's for fun.